So maybe your relationship is not everything you thought or hoped it would be. Maybe it's a complete disaster. Maybe it's doing just fine, but needs a little spark. Or maybe your relationship is an extremely happy one and you want it to stay that way. Whatever the status of your relationship, I'm sure the following article will certainly make you stop and think.
It's easy to blame any defects in your relationship on your man. And in reality, most of the imperfections in your relationship probably are his fault. Yes, you heard that right – and that's an opinion coming from another guy. I spent 20 years in the domestic court system and watched hundreds of couples go through painful, bitter divorces. In just about every case, I have to say that I agreed with the wife. Of course, I do not know what kinds of things the wife may have done in the years leading up to the divorce that may have pushed the guy to the level he reached. Had I known the whole story, maybe my opinion would have changed. But regardless of who's at fault, placing all the blame on him, nagging, and constantly trying to change him probably is not going to solve much of anything and will most likely result in a break-up. So with that thought in mind, what can you do? Here are a few suggestions to a stronger, healthier bond.
Make your lover the most important thing in your life. I know, life is tough, it's stressful, and many women rank the needs of their children, family, friends, and maybe even their career ahead of their man. Move him to the top of the list. Make time for him every single day. Ask him about his job, his day. Let him be the focus of your attention even for a few minutes. Putting the focus on him will lift his spirits and in turn yours.
Do not take him for granted. Believe it or not, there are lots of things he does for you every day that you've probably stopped noticing. Tell him you appreciate everything he does for you. I promise you, he'll notice and he'll try even harder to make you happy if he gets a heartfelt "thank you" in return.
Keep the fire burning. Maybe he's not quite the hunk he could be, but he needs affection just as much as you. Tell him you love him every day. Try an occasional compliment. Make tonight's dinner a romantic encounter. Get a bottle of wine, candles, put on his favorite dress, of course cook his favorite dish, and make what is otherwise just another meal something special.
This one you may not like, but here goes. Take pride in your appearance. Eat right, exercise, put special emphasis on your hair and makeup. Too many couples have thrown in the towel on their appearance and, along with it, their health and the respect of their partner. If you've gained a few pounds, stop putting it off, work on that immediately. If you take pride in yourself and commit to a healthy lifestyle, I promise you every other area of your life will suddenly improve, including your love life. You'll gain immediate respect not only from your significant other, but from friends and coworkers. Do not fall for the lame excuse that just because you're married or in a relationship you can "relax" and not worry so much about your appearance. What does that kind of attitude say to your mate? If you're really in love and want to hang on to your guy, it's more important now than ever.
Guys need time for themselves and to be with friends. If you've discouraged him in the past from spending time with his buddies doing "guy things," do a turnabout and instead encourage him to go. You'll gain his immediate respect, and chances are he'll instead choose to spend more time with you. There's nothing wrong with a little reverse psychology. Now, when I say "guy things," I'm not talking about hanging out in the bars, but let him go play golf, go fishing, whatever his passion may be, and he'll be a much happier man and, thus , a much better husband.
Once a week, go out together, just the two of you, on a "date night." Wow him with your appearance. Go all out, remind him of why he fell for you in the first place. And make it a romantic date, perhaps a romantic dinner and drinks. I'm not talking fast food and a movie. Too many couples get stuck going to yet another movie. Keep the focus on each other.
These are just a few simple suggestions that might make all the difference. Give them a try. What do you have to lose? Remember, if he's happier, you'll be happier.