Love is a tricky thing, is not it … particularly if you or your partner are trying to maintain a healthy and lasting relationship. Of course, since all of us are living in these crazy times-just ask the Mayans-there are just some instances when you and your partner may hit a rough patch and immediately call off the relationship. Case closed, right? Well … no.
Admit it; there are times when you're still hung over your ex. But fret not-more often than not, your ex may feel the same way, too. However, people being people, neither parties are willing to make the "first move" (Thus, the title of this piece. See what I did there?). There is, on the other hand, a way to how you can find out if your ex still wants to hook back up with you. It's not that hard to find out; all you need is to be aware of a few signs that are "carelessly" shown away by your ex. Want specifics, eh? Then scroll down below to find out!
Secret Sign Number 1: "Keeping in touch"
With the prevalence of long-distance communications through mobiles and the Web, it is just impossible not to maintain contact with anyone … your ex, included. However, there are some careful throwaway signs that you should look out for. For instance, it may not seem odd at first that you ex is frequently calling or chatting with you in the middle of the day. But what if s / he suddenly calls you at 2 in the morning with no other reason other than for "someone to talk to"? The dealbreaker? That ex of yours wanting suddenly to meet up in person … with only the two of you alone. Well, that "meeting" may turn out to be other things at first, but the fact that that ex of yours really went out of the way to see you in person may mean that-physically speaking-s / he is still not over you . In other words, your ex is open to dating with you again.
Secret Sign Number 2: "Mood Swings"
One of the things to consider if your ex still wants you bad is if s / he displays these frequently erratic mood changes while talking with you. For example, does your ex unnaturally go overboard in showing that you that s / he had a great time with you? How about those talks where s / he frequently speaks out about "missing" those things that you usually do together when you were exclusively in a relationship? Well, it's all fine and dandy if you think about that, but there's a flipside to it: there are times when your ex suddenly becomes aloof and detached. Why should you keep up with this infuriating behaviour? Simple: your ex does not know what to think of you yet. S / he may want you back in a heartbeat, but at the same time, your ex has recurring memories of why you two broke up in the first place. It may sound like you're dealing with a toddler, but that's completely normal behaviour in this case.
Secret Sign Number 3: "Thinking of The Future"
Ah, yes … to paraphrase from Bad Boys, the —- just got real. At this point, you can expect that all the "subtlety" you may have experienced from your initial re-acquaintance with your ex goes flying right out of the window. Other than the fact that your ex may frequently look at your past relationship with some amazingly Technicolored rose-tinted glasses, s / he is now hinting at wanting to spend more time with you-be it on an "exclusively dating" basis, or even picking up where you left off with your past relationship. Be forewarned, though. It's true what psychologists tell us about nostalgia-it only makes us remember the "good things" in life without taking into account of how we lived that life in the past. If both of you are considering hooking up together, you both need to seriously go back and re-examine what went wrong in the first place. Is it related to the bad habits of your former partner? How about a quirky trait that you find "cute" at first but just annoyed the hell out of you as you went along in your past relationship? Whether it may be a serious issue or even a little thing, you both need to talk it out first. Of course, you also have to remember that apologies have to be made in order.
If all of the above sounds like hard work … well, yes, you're right about that. That's why we've coined the term "making a relationship work". However, the one thing that you have to keep in mind when considering getting back together with your ex is if you're both mutually committed to it. Rushing things and taking pity on one party can only take your relationship so far, and it may even be downright dangerous (just watch Closer if you do not believe me). When all things are considered, both you and your ex need to do the thing that you know will make the both of you happy in the end. After all, is not that what relationships are supposed to be for? Anyway, hope this all works out for you. Good luck!