Let’s face the fact, not every husband has the ability, time or focus to write romantic love letters that stir the emotions of their wife. To suggest that everyone can be a master of the subtle nuances of romance is to suggest that everyone could be a nuclear physicist. So if you are not a physicist – read on, because there is hope for the romantically challenged. And if you are a physicist, you are probably a bit of a geek – so there is help you as well!
All too often it is said, “I wish you would be more romantic.” If you are taking the time to read this and haven’t heard this, it is likely that your wife is saying to her friends in confidence, “I wish my husband was more romantic.”
All this ‘wishing’ by women is based on the mistaken belief that somewhere deep inside every husband is this incredible romantic inner-child fighting to be set free. In reality, maybe, just maybe, the genetic difference between the sexes not only affects the way we physically look on the outside – it also permanently influences the way we relate to the world from within. Or possibly, how differently young boys and girls are raised forever affects the how adults interact with each other. Next time these women set out on a journey to find this elusive romantic inner child hiding in their husband, they should first locate their own inner computer technician or mechanic.
There is absolutely no intention to mock one gender or the other; or to apply generalizations to individuals. Each gender and each person has their own set of strength and weaknesses. The critical element to creating a strong vibrant marriage, where each partner feels fulfilled, is to focus on the positive strengths while minimizing (or eliminating) the effects of a person’s weaknesses.
Archimedes said, “Give me a lever long enough, a place to stand and I can move the world.” Being romantic is no different. Give a man a plan of action (reminders), the right tools (advice and suggestions) and he can make a woman’s heart flutter. The good news is that any man can be a knight in shining armor if put into the right situation.
By using the interactive capabilities of the internet, there is hope for the romantically challenged husband, his wife and their marriage. To create incredible romance for your wife, you need only take advantage of resources available on a well designed marriage building website.
While some of the online services are basic, others have tremendous capabilities to improve the romantic potential, increase you wife’s confidence in the relationship and add spice to the marriage. In addition to romantic suggestions, tips and ideas, full featured sites will have a reminder service that you can program with important anniversaries and birthdays. A few even provide romantic letter and poem templates that you copy and quickly personalize for your situation. Do a quick search for “Romantic Outsourcing” to see what is available to you and what best fits your needs.
An important aspect to maintaining the romance in your marriage is by meeting the needs of your spouse – in the way she wants her needs to be met. Every one is different and an individual’s needs change over time. Be flexible and make sure to keep the romance fresh with new ideas. Here are some suggestions:
- Just because you enjoy practical gifts, like a table saw, doesn’t mean your wife is the same. Tailor your romantic exploits to her needs.
- Few people would enjoy chocolate cake every night. At some point the enjoyment wears off. Mix it up and keep it fresh.
- Romance is not necessarily about spending money, it is about making an emotional connection.
- Personalize your romantic gestures. Generic off-the-shelf greeting cards just do not have much of an impact.
- If what you are doing is not working – do something else. Every woman has a romantic button – you just have to figure out how to push it.
At sometime in the past a combination of romantic gestures worked to capture your wife’s imagination. How do we know this to be true? She married you! It is just a matter of making that connection again.